The Other Side of Nice

Tag: writing

  • Why I apologize to my kids (then and now)

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    by

    loriday1974
    in

    When I was growing up, parenthood seemed to be all about having the last word. I imagined that’s how I would have to parent as well.  I thought I had to be right; even when I wasn’t because being “the adult” meant holding authority. To be honest, for a long time, I misunderstood what authority really meant.…

  • When helping turns into controlling

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    by

    loriday1974
    in

    I’ve done a lot of reflecting over the years, and never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d ever admit that what I once believed was simply being “helpful” was truly, a form of control especially when it came to being a parent. My support wasn’t always as selfless as I told myself it…

  • What I wish I had known at 30

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    by

    loriday1974
    in

    My stepdaughter turns 30 this year, and honestly—she’s got her shit together, far more than I ever did at that age. If you tell her that, she’ll quietly laugh and shy away from the compliment, but I can see it in her: the confidence, the clarity, the steady way she walks through life – and…

  • How I Learned to Say No Without Guilt

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    by

    loriday1974
    in

    “No” has lived at the bottom of my vocabulary for most of my life. I buried beneath politeness, people-pleasing, and a deeply rooted fear of disappointing others. On the rare occasion that I mustered up the courage to say no to something, I would drown in guilt for days afterward.  The kind, helpful and supportive…